There Comes a Time...

when you just can't try anymore. Some people just don't want your friendship, don't have the time to commit to a TRUE friendship, or they just don't care. I've been in the place of getting annoyed at people when they whined about not being invited. I've been in the place of just living solely for me and going for what I want, and whoever wanted to be on the ride with me, go for it, but I wasn't going to make an effort to be a great friend. I am sorry to anyone that I ever did this to. It is so selfish. In the moment, I saw nothing wrong with it. I knew that I was happy, and I was blissfully unaware of the pain I was causing to others. Now the tables have been turned, and I get to experience the other end of the spectrum. I understand that these people see no wrong in their actions; I know what it's like. They see nothing wrong in what they are doing. That's what selfishness does to you. It blinds you. Some people are actively selfish, they knowingly commit selfish acts, are out for their own good and are fully aware of what they are doing. Others are blinded by selfishness. It is almost a subconscious action as they simply remain in their state of happiness and self gratification, neglecting the others around them.

Don't just ditch people or altogether exclude them. Don't assume that people have some sort of telekinetic powers and just know when you're going out. Don't assume that after someone politely declines an invitation to go out due to previous obligations (i.e. time with family, homework, church, etc.) that said someone never can, nor never wants to go out with you. That is just an ignorant and ill-founded assumption. Grow up and mature a little bit. You never know what a person is going through and how hard your petty neglect could hit them. Think about that person sitting alone at night because all of the friends went out, whether all together or in separate groups, because the invite text was sent to all except for "the one who can never come anyways". DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK SOMEONE IS GOING TO TURN DOWN AN INVITE TO SEE FAMILIAR FACES ON A CAMPUS OF 22,000 STRANGERS EVERY SINGLE NIGHT? Honestly, let's employ some logic, and hey, maybe even a dash of compassion.

I know that it's time to just let it go and stop letting it bother me. I shouldn't let their actions bother me. If they are incapable of simple courtesies, it's just not worth it. You can't mend something that was never whole in the first place. It's just hard because they have no idea what they are doing and how they are treating others. I look back and wonder how many people I did this to. Some people say that it's just human nature to live without abandon, and no harm or foul is intended. I understand this logic. Of course, live life to the fullest, carpe diem. Only you can live your life, and only you can make you happy. But our makeup as humans has a longing for companionship. How do you want people to remember you and how you lived your life? There is a difference between living in the moment/seizing opportunity and living selfishly and without remorse to any harm done. Really, how much effort does it take? Don't drag people along on a string of false sentiments and broken promises. You can't fake it 'till you make it with friends. If someone is supposedly in your circle of close friends, is a text too much to ask? Or how about the common decency to not make bogus assumptions? That whole concept of "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." who would have ever thought it was true? Huh. Paradigm shifting, don't you think?

If you are reading this and getting offended, then you are probably guilty. You most likely do not understand my descriptions of your actions. In that case, go watch Mean Girls. See 'The Plastics'?

Insert your face. (The real one, not all the other ones you wear.)

Look in a mirror.

Congratulations.